Upon hearing that Manchester United will be hosting Juventus’ Cristiano Ronaldo in the group stage of the Champions League, eager fans have already started to form a long queue outside of Old Trafford in frenzied anticipation of a post-defeat selfie with the forward.
“As soon as I saw the news that we could potentially get a selfie with Ronnie after he’s given us a right good hiding, I bolted out the front door and headed straight for Old Trafford,” said local United fan Billy Roundtree, adding that despite there already being roughly 100 United fans ahead of him in the queue that he was in it for the long haul.
“I’ve looked at some of the competition around me and I don’t think they’ve got it in them to go the distance. Once the sun goes down and the temperature drops it’ll soon thin the herd. I’ve told the missus to bring over the camping gear and a thermos of bovril. Come morning time we’ll see who really wants it. It’s easy enough getting selfies with the likes of Lucas Moura after a defeat, but I’m not missing out on the chance to grin next to a triumphant Ronnie, especially if he’s just knocked us out.”
At the time of publishing, the queue outside Old Trafford had extended right the way down Sir Matt Busby Way and showed no sign of stopping despite the lengthy wait.